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Happy Pills
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Chapter 199:- Haunted
I am haunted by memories and feelings from the past. For the past two days, I've been sick, and these thoughts have been keeping me awake even though I can feel my body falling apart in exhaustion at all time. Pieces by pieces, I feel like my sanity is dripping on the floor and I've been falling head first over and over again.
I want to see my grand-mother so bad. She is the only family that I have left now that Nihal is dead. Each days passes, and each day I fear a phone call. I fear the sudden news of her death, and that feeling of completely powerlessness that I had felt, still feel, when I received the news about Nihal.
For some reasons tonight I seem to be able to recall every single detail of the last time that I went to visit my Grand-mother's home country. The last time that I saw her, and that I saw my beautiful, kind Nihal. I remember the house where I stayed for two months, every days in her company, and then the time that I stayed at my grand-mother's house in the desert--I remember so much, I remember everything.
Will sleep get to me tonight or will I have to be tortured another day?
I wish I could go, I wish I could see her, my short, small, burning with the fire of life woman that my grand-mother is. But it's all just a matter of money.
But it's all just a matter of fear. I don't want to go alone...
I am haunted by memories and feelings from the past. For the past two days, I've been sick, and these thoughts have been keeping me awake even though I can feel my body falling apart in exhaustion at all time. Pieces by pieces, I feel like my sanity is dripping on the floor and I've been falling head first over and over again.
I want to see my grand-mother so bad. She is the only family that I have left now that Nihal is dead. Each days passes, and each day I fear a phone call. I fear the sudden news of her death, and that feeling of completely powerlessness that I had felt, still feel, when I received the news about Nihal.
For some reasons tonight I seem to be able to recall every single detail of the last time that I went to visit my Grand-mother's home country. The last time that I saw her, and that I saw my beautiful, kind Nihal. I remember the house where I stayed for two months, every days in her company, and then the time that I stayed at my grand-mother's house in the desert--I remember so much, I remember everything.
Will sleep get to me tonight or will I have to be tortured another day?
I wish I could go, I wish I could see her, my short, small, burning with the fire of life woman that my grand-mother is. But it's all just a matter of money.
But it's all just a matter of fear. I don't want to go alone...
