DISSCLAIMER: Anything Twilight belongs to Steph Meyer and the song lyrics belong to Hinder. The story in itself, is all mine.

Lips of an Angel

Laying in bed with my arms around my imprint, her soft body molding into mine, I could feel her every breath. I breathed in deep taking in her cinnamon and clove scent deep into my body. I held her warm scent inside me as long as I could before the need to take another breath had my lungs screaming. I loved her so much it made my heart ache.

But why was I laying here thinking of someone else?

I could see her short, dark hair. Her dark brown eyes that had, at one time, looked on me with love, but now were just filled with hurt and anger. Her lean, sleek body as it phased into her beautiful wolf always leaves me a little breathless. I try so hard not to think of what we once were while in wolf form, but sometimes it’s just so hard. 

Emily rolled away from me and onto her belly, bringing my attention back to her. The scarred side of her face was facing up. Guilt ate me up every time my eyes met those jagged things on her face.

A bear, I had to roll my eyes at that thought. 

When I heard that excuse, I wanted to run head first into the nearest tree. I wanted to hurt myself. I wanted to make myself hurt as much as I have hurt her. She holds no ill will toward me, but sometimes… I want her… I want her to hate me for what I did to her.

I can’t help but wonder if my imprinting had anything to do with the marks I put on her. Deep down inside I knew that was crazy, you didn’t imprint because you scarred someone, but I just couldn’t help to think that some of my guilt is what keeps me here, not just the imprinting.

From the front of the house my cell rang, I had forgotten to put it on silent once again. I looked at the clock. 2:00 am? Who in the world could be calling me at this time of night? If it was one of my brothers they would have howled. Unless?  No… I had to shake my head at the thought of HER calling me.

The stupid ring tone I had set finally stopped, I needed to remember to change that. I waited for the voicemail alert to go off, but nothing happened. Putting my hands behind my head I stared up at the ceiling and HER face came back to my mind. The way she used to smile at me, god she is beautiful.

But she wouldn’t have called, I shook my head at the thought, it had to be one of the Cullens, they had my number. Yeah that was it, one of the unsleeping, blood suck….well… if it were one of them they can just wait until sparkle time for me to get back to them. I still can’t get over the way they spr….   

My phone began to ring once again; Emily moaned and snuggled into her pillow a little more. She mumbled something about me answering it, and it was apparent whoever it was, wasn’t going to give up. Giving Emily a fast kiss on her cheek, I rolled out of bed. Snatching the phone off the low table next to our couch, I was ready to give whoever it was an earful. With a fast look at the screen, my body froze.

Leah…

The phone stopped ringing. The face went black in my hand. Still no voicemail. What could she want? It had been months since I talked to her for any other reason than pack biz. Well, at least not since she hooked up with one of the guys from the Makah tribe, god knew she could do better than that bum. 

I rubbed my hand over the top of my head, messing up my short hair more than it already was. Should I call her back? I looked back at the bed, Emily was sleeping soundly in the other room, she would never know. Even if she did hear me talking to her, she would think nothing of it. Leah was part of my pack. I had to talk to her, right?

I flipped open my cell and paused with my thumb over the call button. I should call... She might be in trouble.

I hit call and put the phone to my ear. “Sam,” her soft voice caressed my ear before I even heard a ring on my end. She sniffed and her breath hitched.

“Honey,” it was so wonderful to hear her voice. “Why are you calling me so late?” I was talking softly, no need in trying to wake up Emily. “It’s kinda hard to talk right now.”

“I’m sorry,” her breath hitched again. “I don’t guess I looked at the time. Sorry.” What was wrong with my Leah? She had already told me she was sorry… twice… that wasn’t like her at all.

“Honey, why are you crying?” I couldn’t imagine her letting him hurt her. I would kill him myself if he had laid a hand on her. Emily moaned causing me to look back at our bed. She pulled the thin cover up to her chin; she must be getting a chill without my body heat next to her. “Is everything okay?” I said into the phone.

“Its nothing like that,” she said already guessing my meaning, she knew me too well. Emily rolled back onto her side. Keeping my eyes on her I softly padded out the front door to stand on our small porch.

“I have to whisper ‘cause I can’t be too loud.”

“Its okay,” she sniffed again. “I was just missing you.”

“Talk to me Leah,” I sat on the steps. “You haven’t said so much as a few words to me in more than a month and now you call me up in the middle of the night.”

“Do you want me to let you go?” she nearly snapped at me. I could tell I had pricked her temper. That was the last thing I wanted to do tonight.

“No, I don’t,” I really didn’t, I looked back over my shoulder at the closed door expecting to see Emily walk out of it at any moment... and catch me doing what.. Talking to a member of my pack?  “I just... I just know there is something wrong, Lee-Lee, and I want you to talk to me.” There was a long pause. I waited on her. I knew this was not something easy for her to do.

“You want to hear something funny?” She asked with a smile in her voice. She had always loved my pet name for her. I closed my eyes and thought of her wonderful smile I rarely see anymore. I know part of that is my fault and part of it is just life for those of us that can phase.

“Sure,” I told her resting my elbow on my knee and my chin in my hand.

“I had a dream about you last night,” my heart did a double beat at her words. “We were cliff diving, you know like we use to.” Yeah, I remember it well. “I would jump first and then you would catch me in your arms and we would fall together.” That was some of my favorite memories of our time together. 

I heard her soft laugh and couldn’t help but laugh too. “Funny that you’re calling me tonight Lee-Lee,” my voice dropped and became soothing as I fell into the old feelings and memories.

“Really?” Was there hope in her voice? “Did you…”

“Yeah,” I let out a small laugh. “I’ve dreamt of you too.” She laughed then, full and rich. I wanted to make her do that all the time. I love her laugh. “We were running and of course you beat me… AGAIN... but then you let me catch you…..”

“You know I would never do that,” she laughed again. “You would ha…”

“Leah!” I heard his voice when he snapped at her. I growled under my breath, but I knew she could hear it through the phone. “What are you doing? Are you on the phone again?” He demanded more from her, but his voice got softer; I guess she was walking away from him.

I could tell Leah covered the phone and snapped something at him, but the words were too muffled to make out. “Sorry about that,” I heard a door click shut and knew she was outside also.

“Does he know your talking to me,” I asked, worry must have been clear in my voice. “Will it start a fight?”

“No,” I didn’t have to see her to know she rolled her eyes. “But it’s too late to start a fight. It seems like that is all we do. I think I’m moving back to the rez, Sam, I just can’t stay here anymore. What about Em, does she know you’re on the phone with me?”

“No,” I wanted to tell Leah that it didn’t matter to me. That I would talk to her whenever she needed me, I didn’t care what Emily said. I wanted to tell that I still loved her. That I get lost in her eyes when she looked at me. That I think of her more than I should. That I still remember making love with her. I still remember her soft kisses on my neck and her strong legs wrapped around my waist, but… “I don’t think she has a clue,” was all that came out of my mouth.

I glanced back over my shoulder once again at the closed door. How could I do it? How could I love both of them? Leah was my first love, but now, Emily was going to be my last.

“I miss you, Sam,” she said softly, almost as if she didn’t want me to hear.

“I miss you too, Leah.”

“What happened to us?” her voice caught. Was she crying again?

“You know what happened to us.” My arms ached to hold her. I wanted so much to wrap them around her and hold her till the hurt went away.

“I’m not talking about the imprinting, Sam,” she was walking around. I could hear the leaves crunching under her feet. “What happened to US? To the friendship we once had?”

“I’m not sure,” guilt hit me again; I have hurt her too much. “After I imprinted… well... it just felt like…” I struggled for the right words. I didn’t want to hurt her more than I already had. “Hell Leah, I’m not sure. I still love you.”

Did I just tell her that?

“What?!”

“I said... I still love you Leah,” it was so much easier to say the second time. The syllables just rolled off my tongue like they had done a life time ago.

“I still love you, Sam,” she whispered. “I don’t think I will ever stop loving you.”

Scrubbing my hand over the top of my head again, “My girl’s in the next room, Leah--”

“I know.”

“--Sometimes… I wish… it was you,” I finished slowly. 

“You do?” her voice cracked. “Sam, how could you still feel that way about me? You imprinted on Emily.” Was that hope I heard in her voice? Damn it! I was going to do it again. I was going to hurt her.

“I guess we never really moved on.” Why were these words still coming out of my mouth? I needed to shut up!

“Sam……” so much meaning in just a little word.

“It’s really good to hear your voice saying my name,” my throat began to tighten with emotion. “It sounds so sweet, coming from the lips of an angel.”

“Sam?”

I’m such an ass! I’m not a wolf, I’m an ass. My true form should have come out a long time ago and given me long ears and goofy teeth because no matter what anyone said or thought. I WAS AN ASS!!

“You said you still loved me,” shut up, shut up! “Hearing those words makes me weak, Lee-Lee.”

“Sam,” I could hear her feet moving across the ground faster now. “Meet me Sam?”

NO!!

“Where?” I stood and slipped off the boxers that I had been sleeping in.

“The cliffs,” the phone in my hand went dead. Could I do this? Was I really doing this? I was going to meet Leah? My feet answered the questions for me.

I took one leap and was instantly in my wolf from. I began to run. Her thoughts were all I could hear in my head. Her wanting me. Her loving me. I knew she could hear mine as well. Thank goodness there were no other wolves running tonight. There was nothing being hunted tonight, but love that had been lost.

Thoughts and memories filled both of our minds as we ran. I was closer and came to a sliding halt; a shower of small stones went off the edge of the cliff. I didn’t even hear them hit the water below me; Leah was too loud in my head. I knew what she was going to do. She was going to jump. I was going to catch her.

Her gray body broke through the dark overgrowth of the forest and slowed as she got ready to make her leap. I watched as she gathered herself under her and launched her body over the water phasing back into her human form all at the same time.

At that moment Emily’s wonderful scarred face and soft body hit the front of my mind like a punch. I just stood there. I couldn’t do this. I couldn’t make love to Leah, even if it was for the last time. I just….

“Sam?” her voice was a mix of shock and pain. She fell from my sight, and I couldn’t even make my legs move to see her hit the water…. Alone… I knew the instant she phased back. The hurt was so much it made me hit my belly.

“I never wanna say goodbye, Leah.” I could feel her as she moved away, back toward that bum she was with. I hope she leaves him. He isn’t good for her.

“And you are?” If she had hit me, it couldn’t have hurt me more than those words.

“You make it hard to be faithful.” Even in my head I could hear myself whispering. “With the lips of an angel.”

“Save it, Sam.”  

I had done again. I had hurt her. I threw my head back in the howled out all my pain. All my loss. All my selfish needs to have her all to myself and have Emily too.

“But you can’t,” Leah’s voice bit into me. It wasn’t the anger, there was none. It wasn’t the sadness, there was none of that anymore. The worse part was that there was…. Nothing!

I could live with her hating me. I could make it up to her somehow… but nothing. How did you fight against nothing?

I stayed on my belly until Leah was no longer joined to me by our minds. I knew she was there with him. I could see it through her eyes and feel the wanting for so much more in her heart as she got closer to him. Then I was alone.

Shaking out my thick black fur, I eased my way back toward my Emily. Back toward my future. Back toward my imprint.

I phased just before breaking through the tree line then slipped back on my boxers. My phone lit up with a text, the vibrations on the wooden porch seemed to echo for miles. I didn’t even look to see who it was before flipping it open and retrieving the text.

‘I love you.’ 

I didn’t have to look to see who it was from. I hit delete without answering the message. “Honey, why are you calling me so late?” I said to myself as I turned off my phone and went back inside the house. It was too late for us. Too late for what we could have been.

“Sam?” Emily’s sweet voice floated to me from our bedroom. Tossing the phone on the couch I went to our room. “Is something wrong?” She was sitting up with the sheet held over her bare chest.

“No, Love,” I climbed in next to her and gathered her in my arms.

“Who was on the phone?” she snuggled into my chest and my hand found its way to the swell of her hip to pull her closer.

“It was just Leah,” I didn’t even trip over her name. I was sure I would.

“Is she okay?” Emily let out a deep sigh of contentment. “That guy she is with is no good for her. I wish she could find someone to love. I want her to have the same thing we have.”

“I do too, Emily,” I began to kiss her neck. “I do too.” She stretched up and met my lips as I rolled her over and began to show her how much I truly loved my imprint.